This morning we shared a great thought from a Today Show writer. She wrote about her battle with infertility and how, thoroughout the process of trying and failing to get pregnant over and over again, she found herself asking "What did I do to deserve this?" while shedding tears of pain and lamentation. Fastforward a few years - she has three beautiful adopted daughters and she asks the same question, "What did I do to deserve this?" but now with tears of joy and gratitude. Isn't it amazing that when we join our struggles to Christ's suffering, God can redeem us through them? The same things that make us wail in pain can make us shout with gladness. It's truly a mystery.
My anonymous guest blogger today shares how her own struggles have allowed her to encounter God in a different way. Good stuff.
Today I am so grateful for the opportunities that I have been given and for the discernment that God gives to me. I sometimes wonder what in the world am I supposed to be doing. What is God’s plan for me? It has been said that in order for our lives to be meaningful, we have to go through suffering to get there. That we have to be uncomfortable because if we are comfortable, then maybe our relationship with God is just mediocre. I don’t want a mediocre relationship with God. I want him to take me where he will have me go!
I recently heard someone say that sometimes it takes a tragic event in our lives in order to transform us, to bring us to God or back to God or to even pay attention to what He is trying to tell us.
My tragedy was that I almost lost my life! But my transformation didn’t happen overnight. As a matter of fact, it’s still happening. I continue to feel different feelings and have different thoughts and am still a work in progress today. I have always believed in God although my beliefs were skewed by others at times. It’s just that throughout my life there have always been things that I can look back on and just know that God did that. There is no other explanation. I have an education, God did that! My abusive boyfriend tried to kill me but did not succeed, God did that! I could have been beaten and killed but I wasn’t, God did that! I was driving drunk and made it home, God did that! I was driving drunk and didn’t kill anyone or myself, God did that! I got sober, God did that! I met a wonderful man who I love and who loves me, God did that! I have children, God did that! I have a great relationship with most of my family, God did that! I have had several saving graces in my life, God did that! I am writing this blog, God did this!
You see, I have this crazy little thing called alcoholism which means I cannot drink like a normal person. Something in my brain is chemically different than that of a non-alcoholic person’s brain. If I put alcohol into my body, I act differently and feel differently and just can’t handle it. If you put alcohol into a “normal” person, they may get a little tipsy but no big deal. So because of this crazy little thing called alcoholism, I have suffered a lot. The people around me suffered a lot. I lost everything at one point. I almost died more than once physically and I definitely died spiritually and emotionally until I found God again and realized it was Him who saved me and I could not let him down this time. I needed to listen! I needed to hear Him telling me that I was to be alive for a reason and not to worry about what the reason was, but to pick myself back up and get on the ball! God picked me up, dusted me off and said “stop feeling sorry for yourself, I love you, you got this. I have things for you to do.”
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11).
Today, I choose not to drink alcohol. There is nothing wrong with it, and I don’t look down upon anyone who does drink alcohol. I just know that I cannot and so I make that choice for myself. Today I am listening to what God is telling me and am so happy to be sharing this with you. I have moments where I just sit back and think about how blessed I am to even wake up in the morning. A song pops into my head by a wonderful country singer named Martina McBride, called “Blessed” and I just want to sing it from the rooftops. I love that song, I feel that way! I can’t believe I am here! I have been blessed, I have so much to be thankful for.
So what’s your tragedy? Have you been brought back to God? Do you feel far away from God? Do you feel blessed? Have you reached a goal that you never thought possible? I bet you were chosen for greatness too no matter what your answer is. God works in all of us.
Don’t question it -> Just go with it -> Let go and let God
Momming. One day at a time. One prayer at a time.
