TADA Goes the Sugar Plum Fairy!

It's hardly Christmas without the Nutcracker! Here's an exclusive Mom Squad Blog giveaway to see this amazing show this weekend. I have two four-packs courtesy of TADA studios. One for Saturday's 3pm performance and one for Sunday's. Email me if you want to go! Both performances are in Blake High School of the Arts' beautiful theater! Since the show is this weekend, you'll have to swing by Spirit FM and pick up the tickets - and take a tour while you're here! Happy Advent to you!

A Stocking Full of Lessons

Copyright 2015 Abby Brundage. All rights reserved.

1985. I saw my fifth birthday and snow in my backyard for the final time. My parents had shoveled enough from our little suburban-Milwaukee row house yard and finally said (as though we were in a predictable and weakly-written movie), “No more! We’re moving to Florida!” Cue the montage with the Kenny Loggins song. We arrived in the Sunshine State in August. Yep. August. In Florida.

Welcome to Florida! We have oranges! We have beaches! We have Disney World! We have 132% humidity for ten months of the year! Woo hoo. We’re home.

I’ve grown to love my home or perhaps I’m just too hot to care anymore. While I’m not quite willing to call myself a “Floridian” I definitely have more of Florida’s culture in me than Wisconsin’s. My parents, on the other hand, have held tightly to their Midwestern roots and passions, like wearing a Packer sweatshirt on a 89-degree day and eating raw beef, shrimp & herring on New Year’s. One tradition we celebrated when I young was St. Nicholas Day. I was shocked when I talked to my Florida friends about it and they had no idea that a surprise stocking could arrive on the morning of December 6th!

One day a couple of years ago I was talking about receiving gifts on the feast of St. Nicholas and finally got tired of the blank stares, so I did some research and found out that this is a very specific tradition to a few northern and Midwestern towns, including Milwaukee. Do you celebrate the Feast of St. Nicholas?

It was pretty simple. On the morning of December 6th, my sister and I would wake to the sight of a stocking on the bathroom counter. Not sure why St. Nick couldn’t put it in a less private place, but whatev! They were bonus presents, so I wasn’t going to complain. There was nothing fancy in them. Just stuff like lip gloss, some candy, maybe a new pen or small toy. We knew St. Nicholas had visited while we were sleeping. This took the place of any stocking gifts on Christmas Day, but it was a great way to remind us of the wonderful Saint from whom Santa Claus is derived.

Now as my kids get to the age where Santa is becoming a pretty big deal, I am trying to think of ways to put some extra emphasis on St. Nicholas. It’s tough to compete with the marketing and advertising budget that the world has, so I love that this generous and thoughtful man has his own day. My boys are still too young for a big theological lesson, so for now, I throw in a race car or another small toy and an orange in the toe of the stocking. I just use it as a way to tell them this great Saint’s story. Here’s the story behind the orange!

If you have older kids, I have a great idea to share. First I’ll tell you, it’s not my idea. A listener called me up and said she used to do this with her kids and feel free to pass it on (Thanks Midge!). She calls them Grace & Mercy Cards. They are coupons you can use as stocking stuffers that can assist you in teaching the kids about, well, grace and mercy! Design them yourself as plain or as fancy as you’d like. The gist: Getting something you don’t deserve (grace) and not getting something you do (mercy). They are two separate coupons that your kids can “cash in” when they choose.

How might they choose to use their Grace & Mercy Coupons?

Scenario 1: Little John-Paul didn’t eat his dinner and doesn’t get dessert. But wait! He hands over his “Grace” coupon and gets that cupcake he didn’t earn.

Scenario 2: 12-year-old Mary Elizabeth lied about getting in trouble in school and you sentenced her to a weekend of restrictions. She uses her “Mercy” coupon and shaves 24 hours off her time and gets to go for ice cream with friends.

I wouldn’t say it’s theologically air-tight, but it’s a good starting point. As I think of ways the kids might use these coupons I realize it might be a greater lesson in grace and mercy for us moms. In some scenarios it would be hard to accept the coupon and follow through, so again, we’ll get a small glimpse into how our God is so awesome.

Stuff those stockings with a lesson on grace & mercy this St. Nicholas Day. I’d love to see what you design, so snap a pic and post it in the comments or share it on Twitter and tag it #Grace&MercyCoupon. Be sure to mention me so I can share it too. I’m @abbyspirit. In what scenarios do you imagine your kids would use these coupons? Do you think it will be hard to hold up your end of the bargain?

And the winner is...

Alright, moms! I counted the number of individual entries (no duplicates) and entered the range into a random number generator then counted down from the top (see the pic above for proof, if you have very good vision). Congratulations to... Melissa J! Email me abby@spiritfm905.com with your home address and I'll send out your two tickets to VeggieTales Live!

To the non-winners (never any "losers!") there are still many more chances to win. Tomorrow morning on The Big Big House Morning Show around 7:30am and at our last two Veggies for Hope stops today and tomorrow. And you're the first ones to hear this: Wednesday is "Winning Wednesday." What's "Winning Wednesday?" I'm glad you asked!

Every hour on The Big Big House Morning Show and on The Way Home (so 6-10am and 3-7pm) you'll have a chance to call in and win a family four pack of tickets to the show AND on Thursday we'll give away a four pack with a Meet & Greet! Hooray!

Win VeggieTales Live Tickets!

Like little heat-seeking missiles, my boys started smelling the VeggieTales Live show weeks before I told them about it. Randomly, from the back seat on one ordinary day I hear, "Mama, can we go see the VeggieTales show?" I already had the tickets but had not yet shared the news with them. My big one told me he saw a commercial after Sesame Street. Ah... well played, Veggies! Well played!

There are a lot of things my kids ask for that I'm not crazy about, e.g. the 48-inch tall Darth Vadar from Target. Truth be told, I wanted to take them to VeggieTales Live as soon as I heard the show was coming. As parents, when our kids ask for something good, like a second helping of broccoli (No joke! This just happened last week!) or to go to church a few minutes early so to have extra time to pray (I'm still waiting for this one), we are willing to bend over backwards to make it happen.

Sometimes financially though, it's not as easy as that backbend. Spirit FM and the Mom Squad Blog to the rescue!

Here's a chance for you to win two tickets to VeggieTales Live! Little Kids Do Big Things, November 22nd at the Straz Center in Tampa. It's at 2pm, but come early because before the show, Spirit FM and other folks will have tables set up with activities like coloring, puppet-making and veggie bowling!

How do you win? Just leave a comment with your name and your favorite VeggieTales song. I'll draw a random winner on Monday around 10am and post the name. Be sure to send the link to the blog to friends and family to increase your chance of winning!

Here's some more good news - there are a few ways to get discount tickets - as of last night there was a Groupon for discounted tickets and there is also BOGO 50% off if you use the promo code "LARRY". You have to do the math to see which deal is better. That is outside of my skill set. HERE'S A LINK TO THE SHOW and to PURCHASE TICKETS.

There are more giveaways coming up on Spirit FM and through our Veggies for Hope collections on Monday and Tuesday, but if your little one's heart is set on it, and you can make it happen, I think it's worth it to make the purchase. Hope to see you there!

Itty Bitty Soul

One of the first posts I wrote when I started this blog a few years ago was about my niece, Ella. A beautiful little blonde girl with a sweet spirit and a perpetually giddy personality. Ella and her mom and dad are the first adoptive family I have ever had the chance to get to know. Growing up, there were kids who were adopted, but I never got to know their parents. After all, I was a kid too!

I was so amazed by how perfect that family was. Don't misunderstand, they had imperfect moments, plenty of them, but they perfectly fit together. Then I had the chance to host an event for Catholic Charities Adoption Services last year and I saw it all over again. I think it's a bit of a mystery that although this isn't the "normal" way God makes a family it still feels so natural and right. It's one of the most beautiful acts of love that I think we could ever witness.

November is the month where we focus on what we have to be thankful for, which I think is a perfect fit for Adoption Awareness Month. I just read a great book that would be an awesome addition to a preschool classroom bookshelf or in your own home. Itty Bitty Soul is the story of a little guy who God sends to be part of a family. Mom is a business woman and dad owns a food truck! They are a fun-loving, faithful couple who is just waiting for the call that their baby is here.

I love that it shows the range of emotions adoptive parents go through. But what is even better is that God speaks to the little boy and assures him that although he is tiny, he is important and can change a life, which to me is a great testimony to why we should work hard to support adoption as an alternative to abortion.

Jim Fellows, the author of Itty Bitty Soul, shared that he wrote the book after witnessing his friends go through the process & the rollercoaster ride of emotions it takes you on. One interesting thing he mentioned is that his friends frequently heard, "I know a lot of people who try to adopt and then end up getting pregnant!" as though adoption was a consolation prize. I think if you talk to any adoptive parent, they would say they feel like they won the grand prize, not a consolation. So I asked him, "What SHOULD we say to a couple trying to adopt?" His reply - "You're going to make a great mom and dad!" or "I'm praying for you!"

It's so simple. We don't need to fix the problem, we just need to love them and support them. And I think that it starts with teaching our children, through a book like this, that adoption is one of the most beautiful gifts God has created. What if our children grew up seeing adoption as a privilege, not a threat or an alternative. How many more unborn babies would be allowed to live? How many more couples would embrace adoption instead of spending their life's savings (and emotions) on infertility treatments? How many more children who are adopted would see their life as special and not unwanted?

So check it out - the colors and illustration are beautiful and you'll fall in love with mom and dad, just like I did. www.IttyBittySoul.com. Part of the profits this month go to www.giftofadoption.org, an organization that helps bridge the financial gap for couples who are trying to create a family through adoption. And happy Adoption Awareness Month!      

I See "How Beautiful" It Is

This Sunday God had fun and created a music video for me. He must have been bored!

The communion song was How Beautiful, by Twila Paris. I know, it's not the newest song, but the melody is timeless and our choir sang it perfectly. I've always loved this song. I even had it sung at my wedding.

I came back from communion, knelt to pray and after a few minutes did the usual, studying of the people walking by me. As I saw soul after soul receive the Eucharist, that's when my personal music video began and I was struck with how true the lyrics of the song were. The chorus is simple,
How Beautiful, how beautiful
How beautiful is the body of Christ.

First a little girl passes by in a smocked dress, then her older sister who was awkwardly eleven-years-old.

Then a mom and her three sons.

Then a grandfather and his grandson.

Then a young woman with Down Syndrome.

Then a Filipino woman. A black woman. An Indian man.

An usher who is permanently confined to a wheelchair.

It was such a privilege to look around the community of people I worship with and see, not what the world defines as beauty, but what God does, and to witness it as those words were being sung. The world has a very narrow view of what is beautiful, and if you look over a long span of time that definition changes with the wind. But I got to see real beauty in the form of the individuals who make up the body of Christ.

They're Playing Our Song!

Cool guy, Graham. 

You know that trend of typing a sentence with a period between each word for extra emphasis? For instance, "My coffee maker is on the fritz. Can't. Wake. Up." This is how Graham, my 2-year-old speaks. He uses full sentences, but there is a poignant pause Between. Every. Word. He's into saying "I can't" right now. It drives me bonkers.

Typical conversation-  Me: "Graham, come here now."
Graham: "I. Can't. Walk. Ma. Ma."

This past Sunday at church, Graham was standing on the pew hand rest, facing me. We were eye-to-eye to sing the Alleluia at the start of the gospel acclamation. I said, "It's time to sing, Graham!" I couldn't hear his tiny voice over the people around me, but I watched his lips move and with my hands on his ribs, I could feel the vibrations. Then he said the sweetest, truest fragmented sentence, "Ma. Ma. This. Is. My. Song!"

I've never heard him say that before, but I love that he did. Alleluia. Praise the Lord. I hope that is always "His song". All I could say in response was, "Yes. It. Is!"

Forgive As My Father Forgives

The culprits, eating carrots & licking frosting off mixers.

It started with silence around 6:15pm. Silence is never good in a house of toddlers. Silence = trouble. They weren't in the play room, so I went searching. Liam had to go potty so he went to my parents' bathroom and Graham followed behind with a pitcher full of poker chips and fake money. Don't ask.

I found Graham sitting in my parents' shower with the coins spread out around him. Liam was going potty. I said, "Dinner is ready and you shouldn't be in here. Pick it up and come out now." And I walked away. Mistake. 

A few minutes later I heard my name and went looking to see what was the matter. Both boys were now in the shower with the glass doors slid shut - and stuck. I got my dad. Long story short. He was getting quite frustrated trying to open the doors which must have come off the track. He was angry with the boys, asking them why they were in the shower in the first place (my fault). And as I was asking... "Can I help?"  *Shatter!!*  I heard Graham start crying and then he got handed to me around the door. Next came Liam, handed off. I saw blood on the ground and hoped it hadn't come from either of them. Liam started crying. I started crying. Everyone was crying! There was glass everywhere. 

I dealt with the kids and my parents cleaned up the mess. Side note - after dinner they went in to try to slide the other door into place and it broke too. Ugh.

I was so angry at those boys. No dessert. No Curious George. Eat dinner and get in bed. I reminded them that I told them to get out of the shower and they didn't listen. At dinner Liam apologized to my dad for breaking the door and my dad pointed out that they didn't break it. He did. I jumped in to say, but you WERE disobeying. I didn't want to let them off the hook. When it came time for tucking in, I was cold to them, but tried to make sure the night ended on a loving note. 

Meanwhile in Adult Land, I was crying. Telling my dad I was so sorry. He said - don't worry about it. It's okay. He was frustrated, but he didn't lose his temper with me. 

I couldn't help but think about the story of the Unmerciful Servant from the gospel of Matthew, Chapter 18. The king forgave his huge debt but then when someone owed HIM a smaller one he was unmerciful and threw him in prison. I was the middle-man debtor in this story-turned-real-life. My dad forgave me before I even asked yet I was so angry that I couldn't properly tuck my kids into bed.

But here's the tough part: When it comes to parenting, if you are too quick to forgive do you miss out on the opportunity to teach a lesson? Of course there is a lesson there on forgiveness and mercy, but where's the dividing line between holding on too long and reinforcing the message? 

What It Means to Be a Woman

newborn-nelly, by rotorhead 2003 via freeimages.com

Have you seen this article by Ruben Navarrette Jr. from The Daily Beast? I said on The Big Big House Morning Show that the headline is the most powerful wishy-washy statement I've ever read. It read: I Don't Know If I'm Pro-Choice After Planned Parenthood Videos. Wow. Even though it is not even close to being a firm declaration, that took courage and I think it is what a lot of people are thinking or at least feeling in their hearts.

The part of Mr. Navarrette's article that resonated deepest with me is his reasoning for why he has been pro-choice for 30 years. Consequently, it is the same reason that he is "on the bubble" of being pro-life. He says it's because he is a man. For so long he stood on the sidelines because, as a man he didn't feel like it was his right to decide what a woman did with her own body. He has come to realize with the loving nudge of his pro-life wife that declaring neutrality is "wimping out" and what it means to be a man is to use your voice to protect a child - your own or someone else's, even if their own parent is the one from whom they need to be protected.

Wow again.

My initial response was, "Good for you, 'man'". And then I thought, if that's what it means to be a man, then what does it mean to be a woman? I think to be a woman is to nurture, love, create life. And I'm not just talking about getting pregnant and rearing children. We are nurturing, loving & creating when we plant a garden, listen to a friend's story, help organize a bake sale at school or drive in bumper-to-bumper traffic to make money to put dinner on the table (often all within 24 hours).

In response to the abortion debate, if to be a man is to protect a child then I think to be a woman is to nurture a child. But how do we do that if the child hasn't even been born yet? We do that by supporting our local pregnancy centers. We do that by encouraging couples struggling with infertility to consider adoption. We do that by teaching our kids how to be compassionate towards the girl in school who (rumor has it) is newly pregnant. Our teenage children (or the kids in our church's youth group) are on the front lines. They are our eyes and ears on the battle ground. Take your teenager to a pregnancy center and ask for a tour or attend a fundraising dinner and let them hear a story of a life saved. And most importantly, we pray.

The worst thing we can do is nothing. That's not the kind of woman I am. Come to think of it, I don't know many women who ever sit around and do nothing, especially when a life is on the line.

What else WILL YOU DO to help nurture, love & create life this week?