1. My professional cheerleading career is being put on hold.
2. My professional radio career is going to get tricky for a while
And 3. My kids just hit the mom jackpot.
After about three months of struggling with on and off hoarseness, I finally went to an Ear, Nose & Throat doctor. He told me I have a hematoma (a blood blister) on my right vocal cord as a result of a hemorrhage. After we discussed the problem, he started explaining the solution. The first thing he asked is if I have small children. I laughed. "A three and a one year old!", I said, wide eyed. He sighed and put his head down, knowing that complete vocal rest is not an option. Then I added, "And I do a morning show on the radio!" He said, "Well, you're about to take an extended leave."
After a bit of back-and-forth, and if I'm understanding him correctly, I have three options. Cue list #2 of this blog post:
1. Immediate surgery which will put me out of commission for about a month.
2. Ignoring it and doing permanent damage to my vocal cords and potentially losing my voice completely.
3. Resting my voice and using medication to try to let that hematoma heal before it develops a callous (permanent damage).
So we are going for option 3. I'm taking steroids for the next six days that in his words, "will make your butt get big." Awesome. Thanks, Doc. And using an inhaler twice a day which, if I don't rinse my mouth after using, again, in his words "you'll get a yeast infection in your mouth." Isn't he just FULL of happy news?!
When I got home from the doctor I pulled Liam aside and told him he was going to have to be a very good listener and do things the first time I tell him because I can't talk very much. I'm sure in his 3-year-old mind this meant for the next thirty seconds. I didn't want to get into the three weeks thing. I might as well say three decades. Later that night I tried my best at charades to ask him if he wanted to watch an episode of Curious George. Yes, I scratched under my arms to mimic a monkey. He just stared at me like I'm nuts. Thank God these boys aren't older or else I'm sure they would take advantage of the "no yelling" thing.
I am sure God will use this to show me that as a self-professed "yeller" I don't need to raise my voice at my kids as much. I am actually kinda curious to see how they will react to me not talking to them as much. We talked about fruits of the Spirit this morning on the show and self-control is one that I will need to exercise more than ever. I CANNOT yell at my kids for the next three weeks. Challenge accepted. I guess!
The other side of this diagnosis is work. The staff is on-board with not talking to me for a while. I didn't have to twist many arms. I've found that when I whisper, so does the person I'm talking with, so there have been a lot of quiet conversations around the office. But the bigger issue: I talk for four hours a day AND we have Hopesgiving (our on-air fundraiser) the third week of what is supposed to be a three week period of rest! AHHHH! (That was a silent scream.)
You could say this mom/radio host/naturally chatty gal is a little overwhelmed. What's the point, God? What are you showing me here? Is this all going to be ok? Actually how big is my butt going to get?
I went to the scriptures for some peace. Funny enough, the woman in these verses was suffering from a hemorrhage too, but hers had been going on for twelve years! I thought I was bad about going to the doctor. I kid! I kid!
Matthew 9:20-22
A woman suffering hemorrhages for twelve years came up behind him and touched the tassel on his cloak. She said to herself, “If only I can touch his cloak, I shall be cured.” Jesus turned around and saw her, and said, “Courage, daughter! Your faith has saved you.” And from that hour the woman was cured.
Could you please say a prayer for me? For healing, self-control and that when all of this is said and done some of my jeans still fit. Thanks. You're in my prayers, too.
Prayers are flowing your way from your family at St. James in Port Richey. Just to let you know a few years back my husband Joe was told he had nodules on his chords and he is are youth music minister. so not only having to have surgery but absolutely NO TALKING afterwards was a struggle. The fact that he is and I won't say stereo typical Italian talker LOL but he is what people might describe as one he could not sing for even longer and whispering we were told by his doctor causes more damage then talking. You may want to check that out and knowing your children can not read you may want someone to stay with you and remember to ALWAYS carry a dry erase board or notebook with you. We bought him Disney cars themed notebook and erase board. Hey if your gonna be down for a while at least have some fun. We will miss you in the mornings but Fernando and your will have a ball with your notes, I'm sure. Please take it easy and God Bless, Judy
ReplyDeleteThanks, Judy. We are living with my mom & dad, so that is a HUGE help. My mom did most of my speaking for me last night. I didn't know that about whispering, so thanks for the heads-up. I might have to invest in that white board!
ReplyDeletePrayers are headed your way! We went through the same thing with Jason and he had to take a sabbatical from leading worship because he did have a callous and had surgery to remove it. It was really hard to go through for him and really hard for me to watch. But there was this song that brought me some peace and I played it for him. I know you know it the lyrics says "If I had no voice; if I had no tongue,
ReplyDeleteI would dance for you like the rising sun.
And, when that day comes and I see your face.
I will shout your endless, glorious praise"
You Are- Colton Dixon
Jason messaged me on FB with some sympathetic advice. Thank you. :) Lotsa water too, he said.
DeleteDo as the doc ordered and rest your throat. As for the mouth yeast infection, asthma sprays are the same. Just rinse your mouth after using and you will be fine. I hope you get better soon and do not need surgery!
ReplyDeleteI think it is an asthma med actually. Q-something.
DeletePrayers coming your way, Abby! We love listening to you on the morning show. You're such an encouragement to so many! Praying for your peace f mind, peace in your home and your body heals quickly! Love and hugs from one mom to another! <3
ReplyDeleteThe perfect prayer! Thank you!
DeleteMy first psychiatrist when I was initially diagnosed as autistic prescribed paroxetine, which he told me would cause weight gain. Then he immediately followed it up with, “But you’re not exactly the Good Year Blimp."
ReplyDeleteWill be praying for you and put you on the "Prayer Warriors" list on Friday. Too bad Liam can't read (or can he?) but I'm sure your mom will be your voice. The right decision will come to you. Buy some stretch pants! Just kidding. You could use a few extra pounds. Love ya.
ReplyDeleteAud & Grandpa
I really really feel God is going to do something amazing through this and I find myself getting excited to see how He is going to bring beauty from your ashes on this. Sorry about your possible big butt&mouth yeast infection lol will pray those don't happen and speedy recovery in Jesus name. I do know He gives purposes out of our pain because I was a single parent of 3 due to abuse&within my first five years of single parent hood I had cancer two times, we lived in three different shelters, public housing etc..BUT GOD was so faithful during that time&that's where my ministry was born from I've written 2books, done radio show interviews, co founder of Victorious Women Ministry. I say all that to give praise to God that when I wanted to give up He always showed up&now I've been cancer free for 2years, married to wonderful man, my kiddos are stable (very rough journey for them during that 5years). All I can say is what maybe percieved as a set back I feel God will flip the script&this will actually set the stage for some sort of comeback. He loves you so much! !
ReplyDeletePraising God THROUGH OUR trials, I've recently learned, can be so Powerful as it is through the trials that we grow closer to Him. Praying for all that you asked for, Dear Abby, and remember OLOR (and other Church's now too) has a monthly Healing Mass where Jesus is Working TRUE Healing Miracles all of the time. Pax, my Friend.
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